Monday, May 26, 2014

Bird Turd-ed Rationalizing

I cleaned the bird turd off my car today.

To avoid the risk of sounding like I'm updating some social media status with a mundane detail of my life (think I'm-eating-a-sandwich type of thing), I'm going to explain my aforementioned comment a bit more.

This week, I had to be at church on Sunday morning about an hour early to help prepare for the worship service. One of the perks of showing up to church early is getting a primo parking spot. I'm talking the kind of spot where it's so close to the door, the walk doesn't even make you break a sweat in 95 degree weather in jeans and a button up. Now that's what I call living. Upon visualizing this parking spot, I got all excited:

"Boy, has Jesus shined His light on me! This parking spot is top-notch, good sir!"

This joyous thought process was interrupted by quite the intrusive thought:

"Shouldn't you give up that spot for someone else?"

But fear not! I would never be persuaded by such a sneaky conviction!

"No, of course not! I'm here early for one of the first times in my 10+ years of coming to this church! Why would I give my spot up? Plus, by parking here, I'm probably helping someone else along in their path to spiritual growth. Having them park farther away from the church will be a good tool to teach them patience! (I'm not kidding you, this is actually what I was thinking.)"

So I slid into the parking spot and walked into church without a drop of sweat and the most smug of all faces. Everything was great! Well, yesterday, I learned that the early bird actually just gets the bird turd. When I walked out of church and headed to my car, I was flabbergasted to find a... gift on my car. Or several gifts, rather. It seemed like an entire legion of pigeons had eaten way too much and then decided to role-play as World War II Bombers for the entire church service directly over my car. The war woulda been won a lot quicker if there were more bombers as talented as those pigeons.

"Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others." (Philippians 2)
I believe that's what they call getting roasted by the Scriptures. I love how, when the provocation of the Spirit prompts us to do something right, we immediately begin to rationalize it so we can attempt to make ourselves the exception to the rule. And when I say that I love that, what I'm saying is I want to punch that in the face-hole.

Anyhow, I think that God is working on sanctifying me and making me look more and more like Him. In the meantime, I guess I'll have to accept the consequences for my sin, keep cleaning the bird turd off my car, and learn to give up that parking spot.

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